Ah yes, I was recently reminded that 2 years have gone by since I decided to run a 5k....and change my life.
I became friends with a exercise powerhouse of a woman, who ran alongside me and prodded me. I will NEVER FORGET how I thought I would truly DIE that first mile. Or the ensuing WEEK of wheezing due to inactivity and exercise induced asthma.As I think back on it..it makes me smile!
Or the weeks of just making it...and watching her shoes ahead of me. Or the hills. And then. I fell in love with running...the freedom of it. The power felt. I was so happy to find my niche...you all know the story. I ran a 5 k. Then...my cerebral palsy kicked in and reminded me, that I have limits...this caused a huge and I mean HUGE DOMINO EFFECT..
I had to stop running. I had to be casted and then braced. I had to rethink everything physical. I gave up exercising. I wont lie..I was a teeny tiny bit bitter. I gained the weight back too.
Meanwhile, I got carpal tunnel in my good hand and elbow, had to go on leave for work, and we lost our house. We have moved 3 times since that fateful decision.
But, even as I was learning to love running, my husband was learning to love scriptures and the Gospel, He became enraptured of the scriptures ..learning and growing into a spiritual powerhouse that amazed everyone around him. It was a bright place for me, even though my physical body was giving me problems, I seemed to be gaining so much in my marriage and family that it seemed like the phrase" When God closes a door he opens a window"...AND what a window he opened! I feel so grateful to all the people who inspired and befriended us during this time. It was amazing.
Just as I had started to relearn how to deal with my brace, he decided that the Church we attended was no longer for him. It was a blow to my spirit and heart that I still cannot fully express. He didn't trust in the very things that had previously made him happy. How was he ever going to even trust in me again?
Why...why was Heavenly Father taking me to these places of greatest joy, and peace and happiness..only for the adversary to rip them away?
Oh, how sorry I felt for myself. was so very alone. It was a dark and horrible place. And yet, with prayer and scripture study, I came to understand (AGAIN) what my purpose in life was here. Even as my husband fell out of love for his previous faith, I became more aware of the strength of mine...and even...realized(AGAIN)..I am not a victim. I am a survivor. I am capable of much, much more! And I was determined that my family, my marriage would not fall victim to the trials we were facing.
And so here we are, in a home we love (made hubby promise no more moving til we BUY). The dust has settled on the explosion of all our trials...we have found common ground and I am just as in love with my husband as I was when we were first married.
I am back to exercising (modified of course) and healthy eating. I am going to make it this time. I cannot say that I am trial free...I am getting arthritis in my good hand. This makes things difficult...but I am a warrior. I am in control of my body, my life. Really learned that we are the sum of our choices. Our future depends on today. We can choose happiness.YES EVEN WHEN HORRIBLE THINGS ARE HAPPENING. We can choose to believe in ourselves..and OTHERS. Even as bad and terrible things happen to us, we CAN still continue to make the right choice. What have YOU OVERCOME? Are you in the wallowing stage? are you ready to come out on the other side...fighting and being the one who is in CHARGE. Because you are ...thats the truth.
